Has it been years since you played with a baby?  Learning how to play is the single most important mindset and skill that you can acquire. You can be your grandchild’s best toy as you offer love, interest, comfort, touch, mind and heart sharing, and time for exploration.

Stuart Brown, director of the National Institute of Play, defines play as “spontaneous behavior that is pleasurable and has no clear cut goals or conforms to a stereotypical pattern.”  All play is educational learning and is a human right and need of every child.

Getting into the flow of play energizes you while benefiting the child’s developing brain and cognitive, social, physical and emotional learning.  Early play is also an indicator of the child’s unique talents and interests that require encouragement.  It is usually the most rewarding time that you and your grandchild can spend together.

Here is an approach to early play that works:

•  Switch gears, breathe, and stretch. Let go of adult thoughts and your “to-do” list before interacting with your grandchild.
• Tune in to the baby in the present moment.  What is his body saying?  Pay attention to actions and movements.  Say out loud exactly what you observe.  “I see that you are kicking and moving your fingers.”
• Follow the child’s lead.  First, match his rhythms, vocalizations and movements.  Then you can offer little changes.
• Play when the baby is alert and relaxed, rather than on your schedule.  Acknowledge his real feelings as OK.
• Watch out for overstimulation.  A baby or toddler will turn away when overstimulated.  Pause play until he gives his full attention back to you or the “peek a boo” game.
• Engage in face-to-face play.  Look into each other’s eyes often and show how delighted you are.
• Get on the child’s level, down on the floor for tummy time.  You may need to do this in small doses at first.
• Allow sensory and motor exploration.  Allow time for repetition and mastery.

Often, I discover that young children are overstimulated at home and school as they have too many toys or the wrong ones.  For example, babies need to have the right size and weight rattles and manipulative toys.  I prefer wooden rather than plastic toys.

Babies and toddlers love music and need to creatively move and be moved.  Don’t forget to stress the crawling stages.  The idea is to play simply, but with endless variations on a theme.  You can “play peek-a-boo” with hands, scarves, hats, or behind chairs.

Change the timing of actions from fast to slow, change the force from light touch to stronger force and change the space so that the child feels comfortable in both small and large spaces.  Your grandchild develops the movement behavior style by age seven that she will carry into adulthood.

When you cultivate the spirit of free flowing play, you and your grandchild can have fun anywhere and any time.